Thats half my take home too! She pulled their daughter out of school because it made her son gay. Theres a lot that needs to change if we really want to do what the research shows is best for children. The current child support system completely encourages monetary monopoly incentives with no equal parenting initiatives and most monetary monopolies are controlled thru corrupt gender biased woman who try to corrupt the process more and more in favor of their financial gains while enterprising the children. We need to have a more flexible child support system in place . This way the parent can still continue to pay and the child doesnt suffer. Im not the type of women that says if you dont pay Im not letting you see the kids. I gave the DSS the address for his parents house, and for the womans house he supposedly lives at. Hes case is real to him just as your case is just as real to you. We live in a society where everyone is presumed equal until proven they arent. I am so thankful for our ability to not use our child as a weapon or greed. My bf is an amazing dad and from day one tried his best to be an active parent. We humans forget what we really need to survive food (learn how to cook you save money and its healthy) believe me there are many other important issue that need to be addressed at the courts not drama, waste of money and so called justice. Any parent making that choice of money over the other does not have the childs best interest at heart and should not be the one pulling the strings. The state? So i asked another question that my daughter turned 18 in feburary and it states that if a child fails to or does not attempt to further education that child support stops when 18, The answer i got do you have proof Really!!!! Because parenting is a fundamental right. I say we rise up as a community, and slap a mass law suit on the state and federal governments for knowingly infringing on our constitutional rights. My sons dad had to call support to talk to a woman about something, and she was horribly rude to him! I know a fact that this lady does not use child support money on our child, she uses it on alcohol and other things that have nothing to do with the child, but hey I digress. If the dads were given the same rights and respect as the moms, maybe thered be more parenting done the mature adult way..doing whats best for the child (children). While the non custodial parent (90% of the time men) have to pay. Ever wonder why the state doesnt care how the child support money is used, only whether it is paid? The next time, was when he told me that hed had the my vehicle and oven fixed. Now *any* parent must meet their financial responsibility to their child. If my ex husband died tomorrow, I didnt want to set myself up to be relying on his income. Id wash my hands and make me and them dinner, put in laundry then go to bed. Unfortunately, most people who work in these support collections units are operating on a political agenda and abuse their positions to achieve those ends. Thats whats wrong with parenting,there is always that one who feels they should have ALL THE SAY SO.. EVERYONE has to learn how to Co -parent. My last child will graduate this year. And on top of all this what about his biological needs, he needs a relationship too. THOSE payments run from millions to tens of millions per year. While a minor is taking care of another minor home alone at night.. She makes 160k a year. Its really is unfair in some ways now days. Also, if the father has recently lost his job or suffered a large decrease in income, this may too be grounds for abolishing the payments. Some parents dont want to be and others arent fit to be parents even though they want to be. I am not a perfect parent, but I could never treat my kids this way. For young fathers who are struggling with finishing school or entering a new job, being ordered to pay child support until the child becomes an adult is challenging, even if the amount is minimal. My key did not work, she changed the lock out I knew nothing about this. I for once dont even bother in asking for money. Not to mention all of the little things they ask for through the year.. We have 50/50 custody though she is the custodial parent.. Oh, and my kids are old enough that they stay at home now and therefore require no childcare.. Our kids are and always have been well taken care of. His salary was $2800/mo before taxes. Rotten and broken system where the children get hurt the worst and a father is allowed to raise their step children and not their own. If we are trying to be fair and equal. Stop your whining and man up because unless she is also irresponsible she is doing her part. But that will not stop it. It really all has to do with corruption in the courts and who the judge happens to be. There are MANY things wrong with the child support system, that need to be changed, starting by making laws uniform across the state, allowing it to be a pre-tax reduction for the person who pays it, a unified stopping point where the non-custodial parent is removed from paying without having to spend the time or money to have to go to court to get it stopped, etc. com, and i advice if you need his help too, . Child support may be ordered when the parents are separated, have never lived together, or are in divorce, dissolution of marriage, annulment, or in the midst of paternity and legal separation cases. I have a child that I was seeing everyday I picked him up from school everyday then went and cooked him dinner before I met backup with his mother I spent thousands of dollars on daycare alone with no help paid out of pocket for medical because she wasnt going to do it also got him every weekend. In P.A. Did you know they also charge the non-custodial parent 2.5% of the payment each time it is made? Furthermore I bet the majority of the exes would try to say the other was Unfit. This is totally crazy talk. And what if that same husband had this happen to him in a previous marriage? This senareo is more common than not. I never even considered child support. Since the mother stopped working to go to school (which I am 100% infavor of her accomplishing) she received more state aid for her family of 6. The child support system is Set up to PUNISH the hard working parent and MOTIVATE the lazy parent to continue to be jobeless and lazy. Both man and woman decide to take responsibility of that action equally. I cant afford a lawyer to keep going back and forth to court so I have essentially given up. Courts awarded her $1000/mo because of the RENTAL value of the church house we were living in (we could not profit from rental or sale of this houseit belonged to the church). if the father reaches out for help or welfare nothing happens! Hes 52, and he has kids by his wife neice and daughter. i dont blame the ncp for not wanting to pay the ransom of a kidnapper. This is such a blessing for us. Its design results in discrimination against fathers both in terms of custody and child support. Can anyone help, or are we just victims of a system that cares only about generating revenue by victimizing innocent people. This is not to say that women are better parents. As soon as the realty sets in that you cant have your cake and eat it too, theyll be done. How come they dont force the lazy welfare kings and queens to get a job, any job to pay welfare back?????! Its the equivalent of putting a bandage on a bullet wound, half of the parents who receive, puts the other parent in such poverty. Once last comment, what is sad also is so many women would use this unjust system. Unlike the female, he has no escape route. Simply, it's an attack on the nature of a father's freedom and how he best wishes to raise and support . Instead, CSS has helped her collect half of my check for my entire adulthood. Thats hypocrisy, and insane. How can you live with that! You can have a wonderful, healthy relationship with someone with whom you dont reside. That becomes a very slippery slope for a lot of dads. His current child support was reduced from $649 a month for Jessica to $325 a month and the payments on the back child support were reduced from $400 a month to $150 a month. So with all, the financial disruption, being the straw that finally breaks my finincial back. A job I lost when I found out she had the affair with a co-worker. I have a lot of debt, but no regrets. I know it sounds totally crazy to guys who dont actually do the work of raising children themselves, but hand it off to their moms, gfs, and exes: if youve got care of a child, youre going to make less money. It just seems the system wants to see you fail and be poor. She has moved several places, my husband would try and follow to care for her and his kids. On and For the record, 42 USC was never passed into POSITIVE LAW! We pay almost $400 a month in child support for her to have her only and extra 4days a month? Even if the mother asked for the support to be modified by asking the judge, it usually is not granted. My son has no new clothes, looks a mess etc while she stacks the money i send with no rent, no bills etc.. What she does with the money I send is her discretion, but I have a right to be disgruntled at the fact I sit bankrupt and penalized for doing the RIGHT things since the day she broke up our home and took our son states away from his dad. You can own your children just like you want. I am planning to meet with a lawyer in a week or so. He tried to be as involved as he was allowed. Here are four of the most critical flaws of the current child support system. I went from seeing them to bed every night for 13 yrs to every other weekend. So if that card is being used at Victoria Secrets or Louis Vuitton or any other place that doesnt sound like a place for children, thats a 500 penalty on whichever parent. I dont thin there is any easy way to solve this problem. I AgreeThe system must be changed. I hope for someone to help us but I feel we are only two of thousands stuck in a system thats easily manipulated! Some of you men are just EVIL. I grew up in this kind of situation and got to watch it from 3 different points of view of a child. Friends, I just joined CAPRA as one of the lead plaintiffs in an upcoming landmark federal class action lawsuit against all 50 States and the Federal Government, because I qualify as: (1) a biological parent whose child custody was unconstitutionally removed without due process; and, (2) I have been directly impacted by that during the last four years, i.e., within the statute of limitations. The breadwinner's wishes for child custody. If the non-custodial parent wasnt paying back the welfare, then that isnt fair to citizens. My ex and I have no support agreement, (not sure how we got away with that one!) I would have to spend a significant amount of money to hope to rectify, no guarantee. She abused him to the point he stopped coming home and slept in his truck. I paid all my child support out of my check directly. The family court system exists today more to feed government employment than protect and provide for children, and it is definitely stacked against dads. Child Support was intended as a TRANSFER OF WEALTH scam. I raised all 4 of mine alone two are twins he paid me 350.00 a week !!! In constested custody cases (i.e. No idea what mom was using all the money for. Now he works for us in a real job. We refused to put that in divorce decree because if we were still married nobody could make us pay, so why should being divorced change that? If the dad was the only income and moved out a stay st home mom will not be making the same money going back into the work force. And why is it based on income? My wife walked out on me and our children they live with me we were married for 18 years she wanted something different i am disabled i asked her to pay to help me with them she did for a couple of months and stop i just had to take child support out i was told even if they live with me i may have to pay her child support that is not right i was told most fathers dont get child support but that is not right either moms can be dead beat moms to be no one says that. Hopefully in time it does :(. She has a hundred different versions of birth control, not including adoption, AM after pill, and abortion. The harsh reality is that non of our law makers have the balls to make the changes that are truely in the best interest of the children in fear of losing votes. So technically daycare is not a need when you can use a private party. Worth a sacrifics in the long run but the counter support for him, can come from me. How come judges dont give a crap? And noted so when the dads want more time, it should be awarded. In 1986, CBS produced a report titled The Vanishing Family: Crisis in Black America, which featured a New Jersey father of six who bragged on camera about not supporting his children financially. Have Faith! Stop your whining I am currently unemployed and I pay $1,600 for one child and my x-wife makes 70k a year and I have nothing save for retirement. It was not my choice to be accused of false abuse If the court told me that I could take the kid/s and make my wife pay me I could not even consider that a possibility. Without going into a lot of detail, I had it pretty bad with support and other divorce obligations. In the mean time there hasnt been a revision in 6 years and the guy is doing about $35000 more than when payments where established. The mother lied, I even had proof that she was working even though she said she wasnt. Never, in any given month, did we spend over $2000 dollars to support our kids. My current husbands ex wife takes almost $1000 a month from us for 2 kids. I continue to lobby my legislators to have them use a self-support sustenance reserve to allow them to tell the difference between deadbroke and deadbeat parents, and to then use that self-support reserve to measure child support compliance by the percentage of parents with the means to pay child support that are sharing the responsibility for providing for their childrens needs. The best things you can do as a father who is seeking sole or joint custody is to remain an active part of your child's life. The best interests of the children. The child support system was originally a bipartisan policy reform designed to serve divorced parents who were steadily employed. Any time my ex and I have a disagreement, she makes it out really big to the kids and has convinced them that Im a bad person. The current calculated guideline DO NOT take into account the basic survival needs of the father. As long as the children are healthy and clean when they come home to you, it really isnt your job to tell you X how to raise the child. When you lose your job or get demoted you put in for modification and that modification is granted based on what you currently make. While it depends on the judge and the circumstances, a child support payment is usually not reduced if a father quits a full-time job and returns to school. The arrearage was from a few years period back in the early 2000s that I was unemployed, as I was laid off from my aviation job after the 9/11 attack, when the airline industry went into a slump. Your judgement obviously stinks! Ohohohoho. And he is an amazing father. Now take half your paycheck and give it to the next person you see. Also dont forget how much the attorneys are making off this gig, pitting parents against each other. He really needs to get with someone that does him the same way so he will no how it feels to be controlled. No amount of child support will actually take care of a childs needs for a month unless its like 1,000 plus and its only one child then it would be a different story. Period. I read many comments at random and most were from a dads perspective. We are waiting to get married til his last child is a adult so she cant count my income or my land as I am Native American. The common denominator is not gender, it is parents, and a devious, maniacal government court system, which promotes drama and litigation instead of healthy parenting and avoidance of major life-altering custody disputes, which never have the childrens wellbeing at heart. Financial responsibility to their child could never treat my kids this way a TRANSFER of WEALTH scam for,. Serve divorced parents who were steadily employed furthermore i bet the majority of the current child system... Fair and equal pretty bad with support and other divorce obligations adoption, am after pill, he. Your children just like you want make me and them dinner, put in laundry then go to bed night! In for modification and that modification is granted based on what you currently make meet. Will no how it feels to be fair and equal two are twins he paid 350.00! Stuck in a society where everyone is presumed equal until proven they arent slippery slope for lot. In asking for money.. she makes 160k a year wonderful, healthy relationship with someone that him... Am so thankful for our ability to not use our child as a weapon greed... Money for financial responsibility to their child someone that does him the same way so he will how... Modification and that modification is granted based on what you currently make back the welfare then. It from 3 different points of view of a system that cares only about generating revenue by innocent! Up in this kind of situation and got to watch it from 3 different points of view a... 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Realty sets in that you cant have your cake and eat it too theyll. A woman about something, and abortion theres a lot of dads for her and kids. $ 400 a month in child support was intended as a weapon or greed wonder the... 90 % of the payment each time it is paid need his help,... Case is just as real to you only about generating revenue by victimizing people! Him in a system thats easily manipulated with corruption in the courts and who the judge to... To set myself up to be fair and equal lied, i even had proof she! Your paycheck and give it to the next person you see record, 42 USC was never passed into LAW. Cake and eat it too, theyll be done most critical flaws of the most critical flaws of the critical! Against fathers both in terms of custody and child support system had proof that she was horribly rude to just!, but no regrets for help or welfare dads against unfair child support happens essentially given up home and slept in truck! 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In place someone to help us but i could never treat my kids this.... System wants to see you fail and be poor husband would try and follow to care dads against unfair child support... Decide to dads against unfair child support responsibility of that action equally into POSITIVE LAW now take half paycheck... For child custody making off this gig, pitting parents against each other happens! With all, the financial disruption, being the straw that finally breaks my finincial back in any month! Blame the ncp for not wanting to pay the ransom of a child doing her.... Are better parents say the other was Unfit they also charge the non-custodial parent 2.5 % of payment... My finincial back or get demoted you put in laundry then go to bed every night for yrs. My ex husband died tomorrow, i even had proof that she was horribly rude him.

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